I believe that the energy driving our universe is love. I believe that love is an energy and that when we love ourselves we become the conduit for which we were designed. The continual practice of Self love might be the most important thing each one of us can accomplish in a lifetime.
I have written and rewritten this post several times now. I even stopped and wrote out a worksheet on why this one is so damn hard to write?! My thoughts have been getting in my own way. I'm willing to set down the thoughts that I'm not qualified to write on this topic, that other people can say it better or have already said it so that I get to experience these words coming through me. If it's boring, confusing, incomplete, so be it.
May love flow where it hasn't yet reached. This is the new mantra I say before I go to sleep. To my way of thinking, next to meditation sleep is the time of least resistance in the mind, so sleep is a great time to plant little seeds of suggestion. Surrender and resistance are two sides of the same coin and neither is wrong/bad. When the kids bring home stomach flu bugs, I am grateful for my body's ability to resist. The awesome power of water's resistance is what formed the Grand Canyon. When I struggle to write a blog post because I am believing I am somehow unable, I am grateful for the essential nature of my being that pushes against illusion until it becomes dislodged. The power of surrender is a great opening, letting go of what no longer serves. When I do catch the stomach bug, there is no greater euphoria than yaking and I am eternally grateful to my body. I know it's gross, but it's such a great metaphor: There's no big deliberation, it doesn't serve the body so out it goes. I am a container, and the tools of surrendering and resisting are part of the experience of being filled. I surrender to the truth of who I am, I resist the thoughts that would tell me anything different, I surrender to the truth of our oneness, I resist the thoughts that believe in conditions. Our nature is to be a conduit for love. If life ever feels like anything else, write it down and study it carefully- you're being shown the next place to use the tools of surrender and resistance. May love flow where it hasn't yet reached, dear sweet friend.